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While on my morning walk, I encountered something most unusual. A person! That I know! From work! A sweet nurse from the Birth Center that I did a triple-take on before I said, "hey, don't I know you?" The darling used to live in the neighborhood right next to mine, only recently moving because she and her husband wanted to live closer to his mom so they could help her more easily in the wake of his dad's passing. Very sweet of them. I like her. She's such a wonderful person! And I hope I never run into her again, as she kind of cost me several minutes on my walk, lol.

This past rotation went well, even with the inclusion of sensing that I may have pissed someone off. One of the fellows that, um...flirts with me, freaks me out, won't leave me alone talks to me while I'm working (I call him Googly-eyes -_-;;) seems to be somewhat through with me. I had been trying--very gently--since November to shake him, becoming increasingly cold and uninterested in what he had to say, but he just didn't seem to be getting the message. Until recently. If his behavior was any indication a couple nights ago, I think he's angry with me. That is the best thing for both of us, really.

I have no idea why this is the case, but nurses and their assistants seem to have a hard time understanding that while we're busy filling their machines with medications, we really shouldn't be disturbed, as it increases errors. Just like when/why we don't disturb them. It's a little thing called WORK. Googly-eyes just would not shut up. If he saw me in the med room, he'd just keep on talking. Now, it's not impossible for me to pay attention to the conversation, but when it's about nothing

On that same unit is a very attractive nurse that I absolutely love talking to. Not just because he's hot--I have no desire to go out with him--but because he's a great conversationalist. Since I feel that my own conversational abilities lack considerably, I really appreciate those who can carry the conversation to great lengths. I do have things to say, but as I have a tendency to be overly-focused on what I'm doing, it's hard for me to talk sensibly and fill the machine correctly. The other fellow on that same unit is the sweetest nerd on earth, and I also enjoy talking to him (he takes more energy than the former, but he's kind, so I say what I can, and he doesn't talk long anyway). As for Googly-eyes? NOTHING TO SAY. He just drones on and on, asking me around a thousand questions each time. Seriously, if you can't just talk and do a good job carrying the conversation while I'm obviously working, please be silent. I don't have time for interactions.

I think it was Sunday night? Might have been Saturday. I had come up for an early morning delivery and saw him sitting in a patient's room. He was on the phone, so to be polite, I waived and continued down the hall to the med room. When I came back out, he had pulled the door to so I couldn't see him! I couldn't even hide my smile. Sorry, not sorry! I don't really feel bad, but I do wish he'd gotten the message sooner. It might have been less of a blow to his feelings had he made peace with me having no interest in him sooner.

I suppose that going forward, I need to practice being firmer with rejecting suitors. It's just that sometimes, I think they just want to have a good conversation, and then I get blindsided by their sudden desire to hump my leg. Can't we just be friends? Is that so bad?

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I'm realizing my lacking fondness for the phrase "when it rains, it pours"...

A fellow from my job that had unusually high hopes for being in a relationship with me last year texted me out of the blue this week. He has my number because I gave it to him (I felt bad saying no, damn it!), and he hasn't really bothered me since Xmas. At the time of his entrance into my days, I was seeing the Master AssHat. As I don't get into the habit of announcing my relationship status, I'm sure he assumed I was single (and looking, apparently...), and began his pursuit. He wanted to "take me out," and I just genuinely didn't want to go. I wasn't interested then, and I'm not interested now. He has dated so many women in the hospital! Did he think I hadn't noticed or remembered that?! And anyway, I don't like shopping for mates at work if I can help it. Makes life easier when things don't work out, you know? Anyway, he had basically left me alone shortly after xmas, which made me think he had finally gotten the message, or found someone else. Sooo not the case.....

He shot me a text around the beginning of my work week asking how I was and if I wanted to go out with him somewhere (again). He wanted to walk me to my car the last Monday I was at work, but thank the lord, I was super busy and wasn't able to get that walk! I felt good that I had managed not to see him at all that week, too! Still, he's back to texting me more than I'd like...*sigh*. I know he doesn't get it, but I am just not that into him, and right now, I am loving not having to deal with another person's feelings. Cold truth, my friends!

As if things were odd enough with him contacting me again, guess who else has started talking? The darling Ex himself. Yeeeeaahhhh...just about chocked on my dinner when I saw his text last night. It would seem I've been on his mind "for the past few months" (sorry, but I have to say how fucking insane that sentence is! The is coming from Mr. We've-only-been-dating-for-12-days-not-3-months. It hasn't even been nine WEEKS since he dumped me! So since we just HAVE to be technical, a "few" is defined as "three or more." There. We can now move on.). He said he's been reluctant to talk to me because he's been "struggling with aspects of life and did not want to behave in a disrespectful or needy way."


Since it was late when he text me (he was at work. It was slow. Fine time for an epiphany...?), and even later when he got that last bit out, I ultimately had to tell him to try again later on today after 11:45a. I need to sleep sometime, and I had a lot of running around to do after my walk this morning! Thing is, he hasn't gotten back to me. I'm neither shocked nor disappointed. He never gave me a chance to bond to him, so, ya know...meh. He probably slept in or something and ended up rushing into work at the last minute. Show's how important that conversation was to him, right?

Still, I can't help but wonder what he will say; what he expects will happen. I'm not getting my hopes up. I'm honestly not expecting to get any kind of apology from him. He probably just wants someone to talk to, and I happened to be "it" at that moment. Maybe he already resolved his issue by talking to Lydia (this friend of his who was having a family crisis very, very shortly after mine, but she was more important than I was, so he physically went to her to offer support and wouldn't even talk to me via text. She has a son and a boyfriend, yet she was more important than his girlfriend the person he was seeing...) or maybe even Katie. Or maybe he was high when he text me, and forgot after he sobered! Lol!

Then again, maybe he just got cold feet. I admit, I probably wasn't as friendly as I typically am, but nowhere is it written that it's necessary to be nice to a man who turned into a monster when asked how he felt about his girlfriend the person he was sleeping with.


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August 2017

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